How to manage your worries? 2 – step guide to improve your problem solving skills

Learn How to improve your problem solving skills. Learn to be more happy, productive, successful and independent. Learn how you can help others solve their problems.

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Problem solving skills are among the most demanded skills when one appears for interviews for jobs. You certainly understand that if you have these skills, you can beat of a large section of competition. 

In our personal life, we come accross a lot of problems on daily basis. Sometimes it feels that the problems aren’t going to end till your last breath. That feels most of us with worry and agony. We spend a large amount of our time and energy in getting our those problems. Gladly, there are methods to solve these petty issues. Lets take a look at 2 step problem solving guide recommend by Dale Carnegie in his book “stop worrying and start living”.
1. Ask yourself- “what are you worried about ?”

You may find this step quite funny. Especially because, you were worried about the problem. However, try to write down this problem in the form of a statement. Try something like this ‘I am worried that I will not be able to create my Android app on time.’

Now, you might have different worries troubling you at the same time. Author suggests, you can write all of them on paper in the form of statements. 

When you will be through with this step you will find out that they are not so frenetic now. You will start thinking about the problem as it is. 
2. Ask yourself – “What can be done about it?”

Write down all the solutions that come to your mind. For example in my case-

A) I can put extra efforts everyday for one week and that can complete my project on time.

B) I can ask my colleague to collaborate 

C) I can take help from online app buildings  sites.

D) I can ask for one week extension.
When you make a list, you start finding that you can solve it. Your mindset shifts from thinking about problems to problem solving. Believe me, mindset is the key to problem solving.

Do let me known your thoughts on it.

​My Experiences with ‘Manache Shlok’.

I was a kid when I read the first Shlok from Manache Shlok. During those childhood days, our teachers made us by heart every single poem or verse that came our way. Thus, I by hearted around 5 to six of those beautiful shlokas in my childhood. 

By the stroke of luck, all the shlokas which I by hearted reflected religious meaning. I used to be averse of religion since early childhood. That was the reason, I  never read Manache Shlok very seriously. It was by some great fortune that I started reading these life changing shlokas during my graduation. When I started understanding one shloka per day, I started getting deeper insights. 
1. Manache Shlok is not a religious book. It’s purely a psychological book. The only reason God is mentioned in Manache Shlok is, people tend to give more attention towards something when it is related to God.

2. Manache Shlok, written in 17th century explains psychology in much details than many of The books and thesis on modern psychology. 

3. Manache Shlok focuses on making one a complete person. It takes one through different aspects of life including but not limited to God, religion, happiness, philosophy, management.

4. It’s unwise to read complete Manache Shlok in one shot. To understand its essence, you need to read it verse by verse.

5. It will help you understand how people think and help you become better person.

6. It will teach you how to deal with different phases like depression, loss, empathy etc.

7. It teaches you how you can become great. The practices suggested in Manache Shlok boost your confidence and self esteem.

8. You will find the solution to different problems you face in your day to day life. Your perspective towards world will be renewed after reading this marvellous book.
Hope you read Manache Shlok. Let me know your views and opinions by commenting. 

How to be happy at work?

Being happy is the process. It’s all about managing stressful situations in right way.

For past few days, my work schedule is marred by the little conflicts going on at my office. In India, we call such tussle as Office Politics. What office- politics really means is one employee does back biting about other. The real tussle starts when other person finds out about this back biting.

The company where I am currently employed is a very small place. We have the total staff of 6 people only. In spite of this seemingly small employee strength, we face a lot of office politics. This impacted our professional lives to such an extent that one of our senior executives wanted to leave the organization. 

Being an office member, I knew about every inside story of this office politics. In fact, certain things involved me as a witness. And, to tell you the truth, its very troublesome. Because, there’s a chance that you will make some enemies even after doing the right thing. I, however, chose the right thing.

This whole incident, which involved a male and a female employee involved in oral spat, dragged on for a complete period of one week. Today, when it finally closed, I found some points worth sharing with everyone. 

1. The female employee had reacted to the words which the male employee hadn’t meant for her. Her disbelief on herself had dilluded her to think that the male employee talks about her all the time.

2. The person who communicated with both these employees had played real politics too. The third person made sure that the fire of anger stayed kindled between two of them.

3. The issues at stake were insignificant. It had arisen out of attitude problems. Had both the employees sat down and discussed, it might have been solved under 15 minutes.

4. It’s good to know that someone played foul with you. However, its not important to go to war at every small instance. The female employee had done this mistake.

 

Life As I See It #HowLifeWorks?

I read a life changing book ‘How Life Works by Andrew Matthews.’ The author has explained how life works. According to his findings, life tends to give us what we ask for. He says whatever we feel for we attract it. The book set me thinking about life as a whole. And I drifted back into my life to find the truth about #HowLifeWorks? Read on to discover the secret.

I used to conceive life as a mysterious thing. As I grew up, I used to observe more and more. Here are some of the observations from my life:

  • My parents raised the orphan child from our relatives. The good thing about this episode was, I was exactly the age of the boy whom we had gotten as a new family member. I was more than happy to have one more playmate. For my parents, it was another responsibility. The already had 3 kids. Raising a kid is no child’s play. It takes a lot of patience, time, resources and off course, money. I often observed that they did not treat him as they treated us. Ones I heard them speak, “these type of orphan kids are never loyal. I am sure one day when he grows up, he will not respect us at all. He will just forget that we raised him.”

What they spoke, came true. 20 years later that same kid, who has grown up now, said, “I felt like a prison in there.  I hated every moment of my childhood.”

What my parents used to discuss came true after 20 years. 

  • Love marriages are considered taboo in my village. Whenever someone from the village did love marriage, my mother used to tell to us brothers , “you guys never do the love marriage. It’s scandalous. And if you guys did anything like that, I will hang myself.”. She repeated this lesson much often. 

Sad as it may seem. Two of us brothers have done the love marriage. What she feared came true.

  • While I studied in engineering college, I had least of money in my bank account. However, I never cared. I lived like there was a lot of surplus money with me.

On more than a dozen occasions, my account was credited by my father even when I had not informed him to do so. I always had a lot to spend that way. What I liked to feel, happened in 99% of cases.

  • while I was in the final year of engineering, I was not sure about what I would do after completion of college. Whenever someone asked me what I was going to do next, I would say ,”I am not sure about what I will do. But I am pretty sure that I will not write competitive exams for higher education and government jobs.”

Guess what happened. The first thing I did after completing my degree was to join a study centre for preparation of competitive exams. 

What I had often spoken about not doing, I did it.

  • While I courted Bhagyashri, who is now my lovely wife, she often said, “when time comes I will leave you. We aren’t going to be married. So don’t you be broken hearted.”

You are right in your disposition, we did love marriage when the time came for her to leave me.

  • I am a lofty liar. I lie about a lots of things. Sometimes I inform people about things of which I had no knowledge. Then surprisingly I come across the articles and videos are sent to me by unrelated friends on the same topics.

What I lie about so often I start believing. And what I believe in often comes true.

  • last week while I was driving the two wheeler, I saw a dog on the roadside.  I thought to myself, “today I do not want a dog to chase me.” 1 minute later, I was chased by the dog across street and I survived it.

What I had dread about came true.

That’s how life works. In my simple understanding, we are like a Television sets. We have antennas to send and receive signals. Technically speaking, Antennas receive only those signals to which they are tuned. And can send the signals at which frequency  they are oscillating. 

Considering ourselves to be antennas, we give out the signals of what we are thinking and feeling. That’s the reason we receive the signals that are the responses to our thoughts and feelings.

  • Had my parents thought only about giving love and raising the child properly, their actions would have been that of love And caring. Kids feel the emotions more strongly compared to elders. He felt there emotions and later came to despice them. They brought upon the situation by spreading what they expected from the kid. That’s how life works. We get what we ask for.
  • Had my mother informed us about what she wanted rather than focusing on what she did not want, I have a strong reason to believe that she would have got what she asked for. She made us think about love marriages and we attracted it. Now she feels that we cheated on her. But truth is she attracted the consequences. That’s how life works. We get what we do not wish for but tell so very often.
  • In my college days, had I managed on meagre expenses, I would have grown miser. My father would have thought that I would manage with whatever money I had. However, I used to spend a lot and he deposited money whenever he went to the bank. Life tends to keep us thinking what we like. If we think we are broke or we have surplus money, we are right either way.
  • While I was in college, had I focused on what I wanted to do with life, I would have focused on it. I would have collected resources and gained knowledge of the things I wanted. However I focused on what I did not want. That was the only answer to my future plan. And I got what I thought I did not want. That’s how life works. We get what we speak about regardless of whether we want it or don’t. We should focus and speak and think and feel about WHAT WE WANT.
  • Had my girlfriend often spoken that she will marry someone else, rather than saying she will not marry me. She would have done so. 
  • While driving the bike had I thought about pleasant experiences, I woukd not have been so afraid when an angry dog showed up. That’s how life works. Negative feelings bring upon negative experiences and positive feelings bring about positive experiences. Thus it’s up to us what we want from life. Life tends to give away what we feel for. That’s why philosophers teach us to feel positive. 

Having The Goalbook #TowardsSuccess

I am going to explain you the science of goals today. This is the science used by many great leaders, philanthropists, philosophers and scientists of modern times. Read till the end to uncover the secret of success you can use in your daily life.

For past 8 to 9 years I have maintained the daily journals. It has been a secret potion driving my life till now. 

A few years ago, one of my mutual friends called me with her problems. The biggest problem she was facing in those days was that of mental depression. Her engagement was broken twice. She was ditched by her boyfriend and had married other girl. Each time she was a victim of the situations. And now, she had reached a stage where she had turned suicidal. She had called me for counsel.

In that period of time I was not so aware about helping someone mentally. However, I had had great experience in dealing with crisis. In every crisis I had ever faced, I wrote a journal note about it. Writing down my problems always lead me to the answers. It was like my journal was a wisest person on earth. 

I told her to write down her worries and thoughts. Even now I do not know why she trusted my counsel. She started writing about her worries. When she wrote her journal she also wrote what she wanted rather than what had happened. And magically, her state of happiness improved. When she called me after a week I could see the magic caused.

Two important things happened after this incident. One, my mutual friend got married to a really nice guy after 3 months. Two, I became a staunch follower of the practice of diary writing. 

I have named my previous journals as ‘The Learning’  and ‘The Journey’. In accordance with the names, I have witnessed the results. I learnt a lot when I wrote ‘the learning’. I had been through a lot of situations while i wrote The Journey. 

Today, my The Journey was completed. I sat down and thought about what my next journal should be about. And I have reached to the decision that It will be titled, ‘The Goalbook’. I am pretty sure that the journal is going to lead me towards my goals. Because that’s the logical state.

I strongly believe that whatever I write about in my journal I tend to believe and achieve it. It’s time for me to upgrade myself to the next level where I lead a life towards good health, good wealth, good success and lots of love. My goals are going to be in the same direction, and I am going to achieve them through the science of journal writing.

In case you happen to have any doubts let me explain the science of journal writing. Journal writing is a secret science used by many a great men to achieve success. Abraham Lincoln wrote a journal; Mahatma Gandhi wrote a journal and so did many great leaders of modern times. Martin Luther king, Anne Frank, Hitler are some of the examples. These people used to write What they believe in. They used positive affirmations while writing about their beliefs. They wrote about what they wanted. They used the art of visualization to their benefit. 

When we write something the thing becomes pretty clear to our mind and is easy to understand. Ones something is easy to understand it becomes easy to believe. Ones we believe something with full heart, we are sure to achieve it.

Let’s Start using this secret science many great people used for their success. Do let me know your views on the same.

What Is Common Among The Happy People I Met With #StayActive

My wife is a great observer. Yesterday she gave some inputs from her observations. Thought those were worth sharing.

We all look at the world. We all deal with different people. What we observe is, however, diffrent. Let me begin by saying, my wife is a great observer. She has got absolutely fabulous way of looking at the things. 

Yesterday we had been to the small business meeting. The meeting was hosted by a very senior person in the business. Recently the host had bough the big bungalow. We had heard a lot about the house from acquaintances, but hadn’t been fortunate to visit the bungalow. It was the first time my wife and me visited them.

When I left from the place I thought, “wow, the host is so rich and successful.” At the same point of time, my wife later revealed she thought, “wow, what a happy home. The walls are lined with paintings and bookshelves.” When we came back home, for the first time in my life, I felt that one day, I must have a bungalow like that. My small flat seemed quite uncomfortable to sleep in.

After the dinner my wife said what she had observed at the place. It gave an all new perspective to me. Let me put it in her own words.

‘The house was so big. They had just moved in and a lot of things were not properly kept. The interior designer had done a great job. He had kept the aura of place to be happier rather than making it overwhelming. The most amazing thing I felt was, there was a lot of positive energy. I felt happier from inside. A few things caught my attention. First one was, in each room there was a place for books. Happily enough, none was empty. There were books across different genres. Second, they had a lots of musical instruments. And they were not showcased. Looking at the host, Mr Bhardwaj, he always exhibits a positive energy. He is a multi talented person. He is a Sr vice president in the big firm, was socially active, had built a business in addition to the job, had lots of hobbies and interests.

I couldn’t help but go on to compare different great people.  Leonardo Da Vinci was a hyperactive person. He had numerous hobbies ranging from drawing, mathematics, inventions and religion. 

I have observed that successful people are always busy with something or other. They are always studying and learning new things. They are meeting new people and are passionate about what they do. That’s the secret behind their success, wellbeing and happiness. 

What do you think about it?”

The Seed Of Change Lies in Visualization #DreamIt

Recently I felt some divine powers playing around me. All I wished for was granted. It seemed to me that things were carved to fulfill my wishes. Now, when I have understood the importance of making wishes, I feel it my responsibility to share the #Secret with my fellow readers.

As per the dictionaries, the meaning of ‘#Dream’ is ‘ a series of thoughts, images, and sensations occurring in a person’s mind during sleep.’ I have come to observe that, I forget the dreams as soon as I wake up in the morning. 

Very recently, I have updated the definition of dreams. According to my updated definition dream is ‘ a series of thoughts, images, and sensations occurring continually, visually and affirmatively in a person’s mind in his conscious state.’ The reason lies at the core of what a dream can do for us.

You just need to dream it and you are halfway near to the realization. You just need to have an unwavering belief in your dreams and you reach too close to its realization. You just need to start taking steps towards it and you will have just arrived.

I had been going through a lot of turmoil in my professional life. I had done some irreparable damage to my image and my relationship at the work had almost reached to an end. At some points, I felt that I needed to change my behaviour because the bitterness was ruining my personal life. I was becoming increasingly irritated. I was gradually turning into a short tempered person. One morning I sat down and found that it was the least of what I wanted to become. I wanted to be known as a respectable person, I wanted people to recognize me for my talents, I wanted to have a positive self image.

I remembered what I read in the book titled ‘succeed yourself by Richard Denny’. I trusted that we can get whatever we wish for. 

That day I sat down and closed my eyes. I dreamed that, I wanted to be respected. I dreamed that everyone adored me, behaved with reverence. I also imagined that I will thank people when they will speak respectful and boast me. I decided to take compliments gracefully. I did all this in the conscious dream.

In upcoming days, I woke up each morning and followed the routine of dreaming. I put my faith in what I was doing. I believed and trusted that whatever I will dream, it will come true.

Things started changing gradually at the office. My colleagues started sitting in front of me to seek professional advice. It was like, they had newly discovered my presence. Suddenly everyone at the office needed something from me and I gracefully helped them. And when they complimented me, I happily took the compliments.

Now my faith in #TheSecret has risen to the next level. My faith in myself has increased manifolds. I have come to know the spectacular power of dreaming. And so I have made it a habit to dream in the morning. Everyday.