Taking with people is a topic dreaded by many. Not because we feel scared but because we seem to run out of ideas to discuss. Interestingly many of us do not know the most important topic of discussion in the world.
I am working in the field of sales and marketing for a long time. Over the period of time I have been fortunate to interact with thousands of people; train hundreds of professionals and do business deals with dozens of them. However, it is very recently that I started working on how to speak effectively. As I often tell, whatever we tend to think about passionately, we attract them.
Yesterday, I had been lucky to witness the live example of the person with great skills. As I explain you the whole thing, the topic will unfold itself.
Yesterday I got a call from an unknown girl. It was a marketing call. She invited me to the small presentation saying that it was only for married couple like me. She assured that I will thoroughly enjoy the thing. Whenever I have availability of time, I am always ready to learn something new. So I agreed. However, I already had an idea that it was going to be a sales presentation.
We filled the introductory form with details about us, our income, where we travel, do we have a car, what’s our holiday budget etc. From which it became clear that it was a company selling holiday packages. A sales representative was assigned for us to explain the things. That sales representative, whose name was Anant, is the hero of this article.
Anant had a faint smile on his face. Its the best greeting i received from someone in last fortnight. What I thought was, he was trained and groomed so well. However, no matter how much a person is groomed, he can’t outperform the natural ones. It seemed that he genuinely liked what he was doing. That’s a great quality in itself.
I was priorly informed that the presentation will last for an hour. I was braced for that. And I had an idea in mind that I was going to leave the presentation if it got boring. I knew I wasn’t going to need their product.
Anant started speaking about the most interesting topic on earth with us. It was the topic everyone of us, irrespective of the place, age, gendre, nationalist, religion will find most interesting. He gave the 30 minutes of his time to speak on that topic. The topic was- US.
First he introduced himself and then asked us whether we were comfortably seated. He asked whether we needed the water or the drinks. He took time to built the relation rather than jumping onto the topic of money and sales.
He started by asking us how we travelled. From then he asked us the questions in backward direction in time. As to from where we came, where we lived, how was our routine today, did our parents live with us, how long we were married etc. He exhibited the quality that makes someone your friend. Asking right questions and listening to the person with utmost interest and sincerity. That never misses to win your hearts.
Recently I came across the best-selling books like ‘how to influence people and make friends by Dale Carnegie’ and ‘Skill with people by Les Giblin’. Both these books teach us the most important and highly effective lessons in personal growth. I was deeply influenced by the clarity in these books. These books give us following important lessons-
- Never argue with anyone. Because an argument doesn’t make friends. Agreeing to disagree does.
- Listen to the person and take interest in their lives. Listening to the person gives him the feeling of importance.
- Agree when you are mistaken. If you are wrong agree to it with open heart. Conflicts will not erupt.
- Sympathize with people- people like you better when you take efforts to understand their point of view.
- Talk with them about themselves – everyone of us has got something to boast about, lament about. Everyone is constantly searching for the confidante.
Talking with people is no rocket science. You just need to be genuinely interested in them. Because everyone has got their own story and everyone likes to tell it. What’s your story?